Chapter 4: Lady of Virtue
One of life’s most costly and beautiful objects is born out of pain and irritation – the pearl. A tiny piece of sand slips into an oyster’s shell n begins to rub against the soft tissue, causing irritation. In response to the irritation, the oyster produces a hard substance, which eventually develops into one of the world’s most beautiful jewels – a lovely luminous pearl. In fact, the greater the irritation, the more valuable the pearl!!
God is using the sands of singleness to make you perfect and complete. He’s developing pearls of character in your life. He knows that whatever you use to “catch” a guy, you must also use to keep him. If you attract a guy with only your looks, then you're headed for trouble, since looks don’t last. Therefore what you look like on the inside is far more important than what you look like on the outside.
An ugly oyster shell is an unlikely place to find a lovely gem, but Isaiah 55:8 says, “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways…” You may see an ugly shell, but God sees the beauty He is creating in you. Are the sands of singleness causing you bitterness right now, or are you allowing these trials to change you into a pearl? The Lord wants you to be a Lady of Virtue – a costly, beautiful pearl for all to admire.
- The Body Beautiful Trap
The key to beauty is found in 1 Peter 3:4 – Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” This kind of beauty can only get better the older it gets. As Jackie once said, “If a man chose me for external beauty, his destiny would be hugging a prune. But if a man chooses me for my internal beauty, his destiny will be unfading beauty even in the twilight years of marriage, becoz of Jesus.”
When you look at the virtuous woman of Proverbs 31:10-31, you will see god’s picture of a beautiful woman. There are 20 verses describing her. Only one verse mentions her outward appearance. If you were to spend 1/20 of your time on outward physical beauty and the other 19/20 on developing the other qualities God describes as beautiful (such as wisdom, kindness n godliness) you would become the excellent woman Proverbs 31:10 says a man should try to find.
- Fit for a King
When you picture the perfect man for you, what is your prince like? Do you see a man devoted to God? A man of character – teachable, loyal, faithful, gentle and kind? What kind of woman do you think this godly man desires to marry – a shallow woman, or a woman full of charm who knows how to dress and capture other men’s attention?
To marry a prince, you must first become a princess. To marry into royalty, you must be appropriately prepared. Even Princess Diana had to go through a period of “waiting & preparing.” Is it any wonder that a heavenly princess must prepare inwardly for the calling to which she will give her life? As you set your attention on developing godly character, Jesus will change you into the beautiful princess He created you to be.
- Stringing Together A Pearl Necklace
Virtue is developed over time as you allow God’s Spirit to do a special work in your life. It is the Holy Spirit, not you, who produces the godly character you seek. These pearls of character are listed in Galatians 5:23-23 as “… love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness & self-control….” As these qualities develop, your life will become like a beautiful necklace strung with the pearls of godly character.
Galatians 5:19-21, however, describes some “beads” with which many singles choose to adorn their lives instead. They are “…immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outburst of anger…” If you desire to be a Lady of Virtue, these beads cannot belong on your necklace.
To remove the bad bead, confess the sin that developed this unattractive quality. Be honest and specific with yourself. After specifically describing the bead that detracts you from your inner beauty, then receive God's forgiveness. You no longer need to feel condemned or guilty because “As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us.” (Ps 103:12)
How does one walk by the Spirit and tap into this pearl-producing power? First, Eph 4:30 says, “Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God.” You grieve or hurt God's Spirit when you choose to think, say or do something that offends God. To tap into pearl-producing power, you must first decide to live a life that will please your Lord in all aspects. From the time you wake in the morning until you go to bed at night, set your heart’s desire on exalting Him.
The second verse is found in 1 Thess 5:19, “Do not quench the Spirit.” When God's Spirit prompts you to do something, give expression to that impression. Don’t douse it with cold water by ignoring His leadership. For example, He may prompt you to perform an act of kindness, or caution you not to say something you are about to say, or lead you to encourage a friend who may be hurting. Whatever it is, seek to obey the Spirit of God in you on a moment-by-moment basis.
Finally, Ephesians 5:18 says, “…be filled with the Spirit.” To be filled, something must first be empty. To be filled by the Spirit, you must be empty of yourself and full of God. You give the Holy Spirit complete and total control of your life. To be a virtuous woman, you must let the Holy Spirit have all of you.
God's Spirit produces true inner beauty as you confess your sins, avoid displeasing God's Spirit, obey even the slightest of His promptings, and give the Holy Spirit full control of your life. Pearls of godly character take time to develop, but how blessed is the woman adorned by them.
You can settle for an imitation necklace of fake pearls, or you can allow the Holy Spirit to use the sands of singleness to create the real thing. If you want genuine pearls, you must allow the Holy Spirit to perform a special work in your life. Determine to string a lovely pearl “necklace of virtue” as a treasure for your Lord.
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