PLAYING LIFE’S GAME…

Sometimes decisions in life can affect our feelings; other times our feelings can affect our decisions. At one point, I was determined to fulfill my decisions. But on the other hand, I was hesitant that it could actually become a reality. Heart to heart talk can sometimes stir up mixed feelings. Truly I was at a junction of dilemma again as Evie and Debbie chatted about their ups and downs last night.

What is it that I truly want? What if I said yes, what if I said no? What if I’m ready? What if I’m not? When I was ready, the situation was at a stand still. Yet when I thought that I may not be ready after all, there were indications that things were on the right track. Haih, what an irony. The inter-zone bowling competition is next Friday, am I up for it? Not that I will be playing. The question is am I ready to face my “challenges”. Am I ready to face something (and perhaps someone) knowing that I may be at risk of losing it?

Do I really have the self-sacrificing Melancholy traits that people say they see in me? True. Love is not self-seeking. And because I wanted others to be happy, I gave up my own for their sake? Well, I guess I have given in way too much. Three years ago, I gave in. Now, I find myself giving in again. Perhaps it is time I learnt to think a little more for myself rather than putting others on priority and end up hurting myself in the process. I’m tired. When will this game end?

“Don’t worry and fret over what’s not happening; cherish that which has taken place.”

25 years and counting…

Last Sunday marks the silver year for my parents!! It may have long past the actual date, but it is better late than never. Better than having them look back and recall their 25th anniversary in the hospital with me, haha. The dinner was held at Kelana Seafood Centre, with my other two ET siblings and I being the organizer. My sister was the overall event manager (cum emcee), my brother the film producer of their life’s story and myself as the receptionist.

The receptionist and her assistant, the rest are just the side models… Hahaha :p

My sis, as the emcee of the nite…

Cell members, relatives, and a handful of close friends from church were there to witness this occasion.

My mom, her eldest brother and wife…

Pictures paint a thousand words. And with too much to say about the whole event, I’ll just let the pictures tell them for me, hehe *winkz*

The “cell group” table…


The in laws, hehehe…

The “bride’s” family…

Uncle Tony and Auntie Connie, the husband-and-wife worship team…

Renewal of vows…

Exchanging of rings…

That special ring from him to her *winkz*

Sweet *winkz*

Our very own BSB band from Grace PJ: The Bible Shop Boys: Tony, Gus and Eddy (L to R) [they came in quietly, made themselves comfortable on stage and started performing - a surprise arrangement by Auntie Connie Chong *winkz*]

Now, let's dance the night away, haha…

Kids really learn what they see the adults do, haha…


Mr & Mrs Simon Teo with Mr & Mrs Mogan :p

Pei Wern, my sis & I…


With Pastor Richard & Pastor Maryanne…

With Ps Steven Young and his sister, Ms. Connie Young… Haha

The Cell Group gang…

The Teng familly…

A good of friend of 11 yrs :)

Presenting the “bride & the groom”, hahaha…


e Guest Book…

I Needed That...

I thought… I reasoned… I questioned a lot before I made the decision… I just didn’t want to get my hopes too high… I was just afraid, I guess… I thought and I reasoned again… I finally decided… And so there I was last Friday, at U Bowl, One Utama… Although I wasn’t part of the team, just being out in the fun was a breather, something that I so needed :))

Week 1: Kah Mun (from the Praise Givers), Evelyn, Calvin (a fellow church member), Debbie Debbie

Week 2: Debbie Debbie [psst: hey girl, u can do it one ;) ur house so near One U *shh* practice makes perfect rite?]

[Someone suggested that I could try bowling since I dun need to move around, juz be at the lane and shoot. But the ball kinda heavy la :p]

I was questioned about certain things, and why I did what I did. Was I sure about my own actions? Only God knows, haha. All in all, I needed that… For which I really appreciate Evie for offering to come all the way to pick me up. Thanks, dear!! Gambate, Light House!! You guys shall win the championship. Amen? :))

YOU MAKE ME "SCATTERED"!!

I seem to have been missing out on some things in my life. Ever since having to go in and out of the hospital, I have not been attending Sunday services and serving in Royal Rangers regularly. I have been missing out on so much as far as a couple of close friends are concerned.

I happened to pop by a friend’s blog, only to realize that I made the wrong move. I really did!! After reading her latest entry, it’s like rubbing salt to the wound. Right then, it made me so emo. I was frustrated, I was angry. I was disappointed in many ways. I couldn’t even understand myself. If I can’t work towards it, can I then find my way back out? I just wanted some time for myself. More than that, I wanted to be out and away, alone. Thank God for close friends who never questioned, but just did their best to be there for you. I know it is not fair to demand him for his time, so I was actually just trying my luck on this. I was glad he said yes. I was glad he offered. Thanks dear!!

He never did thought of a specific place to bring me. Just that he was willing to take me on rounds to nowhere (joy ride, he said), so to speak, just so that I could “set my mind straight again”. After a while, he suggested visiting a friend over at Sungai Long. Not being sure of the directions to her place, we missed a turning, and in so doing lost our way, haha. How on earth did we end up in Kajang? :)) So, I had longer time to “bising”, haha.

Making the best out of the blunder, we agreed on satay kajang [it really took my mind off those nonsense for a while there, heh]. Sitting down for some satay, memories of things that happened back when we were younger really made me smile. Silly things we did as a group of young teenagers back then :p on the other hand, opening up about all the bad experiences that we would rather not re-live. Shedding light on some of the things that “stretched” us, I won’t deny the fact that God has been the source of strength in this friendship.

And friends are friends forever
If the Lord’s the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never
Coz the welcomes will not end
And I know this will be true
It’s the Lord who showed me faith
And a lifetime’s not too long to live as friends [by Michael W. Smith]

I was a scatterbrain right from Monday itself, and I didn’t get any better until the night I spilled everything. In fact, I can’t deny what is on the surface. I can’t deny that I am actually just running away from reality. You really make me so “scattered”. But at least it got me thinking of what I really wanted. So I decided to “stay away from danger” for the moment. I don’t wanna be a scatterbrain. But really, how long can it last?